A sorry feeling, or the way I deal with it

O how I long for the taste of Crack on my tongue.

olc

O Woe is Me

So, I am sitting here at some restaurant on Hilliard St., waiting for the van to get fixed again. Rolling around Western North Carolina I must have picked up a nail. I tried to pull it out and patch it myself, but...no joy. To justify my inablility to fix this BS tire thing, I saw the gage of the nail was really big and thought that any plug I put in would be blown out by tire pressure at some point in the near future.

I walked around downtown a little then found a place that with chicken wings and other stuff to eat and good beer. The truth is, I have been stewing around in a self inflicted depression and frustration. I really want to be doing so many other things in my life than delivering shit to people whom I don't know and really don't care about.

I try to find meaning in delivering critical medical supplies to people. However, anyone could and can do it, I am doing nothing unique.

Yet I am sitting in this place and finding myslef fighting to stay depressed. One wonders why I could even thank that silly thought: fighting to stay depressed. It seems that I dwell on the negatives in my life; my lack of cognitive ability, my lousy memory. My powers of observation and search are woefully deficient. Decision making skills, what are they, I can't remeber? When I have a choice to make and little information, I invariably make the wrong one.

"Not all of your choices have been the best," said my father at his most diplomatic.

Actually, I had a really  tough start to the day and I have had some difficulty shaking it all off. I had to find a box in the warehouse and could not. The box was there, I even looked at it, but could not see the information I needed. I ended up having to go back to the warehouse, thus the whole off and behind schedule. needless to say the morning went downhill from there. 

I was able to shake the stink of failure off after a few hours, and had a fairly good afternoon, yet the cloud over my head would not disperse. Then I picked up a nail in one tire. This is not entirely true, the nail was in the tire for a couple of days and I chose to deal with it today.

I went to the store to get some patches and do the deed myself. Well, it turns out those things don't really work for a vehicle like mine. I got the stuff anyhow and proceeded to try and pull the nail. After five minutes of knuckle busting and cursing, I realzed that it was not gonna happen. So I admitted defeat and made my way to the shop where the dude had it all better in no time.

Once again defeat in the face of better discretion.

I have been stewing all day long and my feelings of frustration have been simmering along nicely. Yet the combination of music, beer and the world around me just would not let me stay in my molassas drenched morass. Despite my every effort, I am rising like little a feeble Phoenix in to a happy place.

The Runtyun worries about my drinking too much beer and the truth is there may be something to worry about if one looks at the dark past that hangs over my very being like the dark clouds of tragic thunderstorm threatening to blow all the good in my life away. Yet the two beers I enjoyed worked to relax me enough to find a smile without having to dig too deeply.

Now, I am on the way to get my Runtyun after choir with a glint in my eye trying to escape.

Damn, I had such a good stew cooking and it is ruined by happy thoughts!

olc

Time to start thinkin' 'bout the Election

       Let me start by saying the perpetual election cycle we live in is making me dizzy. It seems to me that as soon as the last election was over, both parties started to position themselves for the next one, not the mid-term, but the presidential election four years later. Not only is this American war-weary, but I'm election-weary. 

It seems to me there should be some kind of rule/moratorium/law that limits, or defines the dates prior to elections that candidates can run. After all, we did elect them to run our country, not for reelection, didn't we?

Our elected officials, at least on a national level, seem to be interested in preserving their jobs and not working to make our way of life better. The right wing is pandering to their corporate leash-holders. While the left moans and groans about how unfair it is that they don't get the support they need.

The right criticizes and demonizes our President and anyone who does not whole-heartedly endorse their point of view, while not finding any alternatives. They just say what is wrong and do not suggest better alternatives. And the left just continues to shoot themselves in the foot instead of using this time to build a plan to win.

olc

P.S. It is funny how these things work. When I started this post, I planned on writing about something completely different...What was that? Oh a new shiny object to distract me, maybe a squirrel, or a cute kitten... 

A LITTLE LATER WITH SOME PERSPECTIVE

A friend and I talked the other day. She was having troubles with her car and her former BF and needed to vent. I have always liked her and wondered what it would be like to spend a minute with her. But mostly, I just wanted to help her through a shitty moment.

I listened to what she had to say and sympathized. I tried to ease her down the road to Recovery(?), because that was the roll she needed me to play. After a time she invited me to her birthday celebration. Knowing it was a good ride away and might cause some family strife, I said sure and we would iron out the details when we got to Blue Ridge, GA. The Runtyun and I packed up the bike and set out for the 3 hour trek.

The Grinner, this is what I call my Motorcycle for those who do not know already, only gets 80 to 90 miles on a tank of gas. This translates to about 33mpg. The truth is this works out pretty well for this old guy. About the time the bike runs out of gas, I need to walk around to Un-kink my weary old back.

Our first stop, though not for gas, was at Smokey Mountain Steel Horse. The Grinner needs new plugs and the shop is right off the highway. They are an independent shop now selling new Indians and Victory Bikes. To my knowledge, they are the only dealer that does that in the region. I wish them luck. 

Having said that, their parts department could use a little work. It took them 20 minutes to figure out what spark plug The Grinner needed and then they even gave me the wrong ones, a miss matched set. I had planned on putting the new plugs in after we had gotten to Jennifer's. No such luck.

The rest of the ride was OK though almost all highway miles. The Runtyun never complained, however she let me know when she needed to get off and stretch out. It is rather tiring to ride for a long distance. For those who have not had the opportunity to do it you would be surprised. Even the kid said something like, "Who would have thought it could be so tiring?"

Needless to say, the final ride up to the place was on a newly pebbled road that was (How do I relate) FUN to ride. Can you say gravelly and not very well travelled?Finally, we arrived at the house for the stay-over and walked into a house of tension. 

There were dogs to defuse antipathy and kids for the Runtyun to be with. My friend still has this smile and twinkle in her eye that lights up a room, so I enjoyed the moment for seeing a friend.

We talked about nothing in particular and ate BBQ for supper, then watched some TV, the kids wallowed in the hot-tub. One of them, who was 7 years old seemed to live for time in the hot tube. The girl was 10, and the sweetest thing.

My friend and I talked a little, it seemed like superficial topics, but nothing important. As the evening moved along I began to feel a little abandoned. Every time I looked at my friend, she was looking somewhere else. I wondered at one point if she understood what it took for me to get over to her so she could have a friend nearby.

Finally, my friend said she was going to bed, and I took that lead and announced my intention to do the same. I dragged the Runtyun to our assigned room. And tried to sleep. It is a little difficult to sleep when channel surfing. Finally, I turned the off the TV and rolled over, almost falling off the skinny twin bed.

The next morning finally dawned, and I rolled out of bed, on purpose this time.

I enjoyed the incredible view the porch offered, regretting the screening making decent pictures impossible. Yet looking out over the woods leading to Blue Ridge Lake, the clouds were white and gray and broken by mountain tops. As the sun rose it moved along warming the day so the morning ground covering mist undulated revealing glimpses of mountain forests and wisps of the lake…

"Neil, Would you mind going to the store and getting some eggs for our pancakes?" Actually, I wanted to get some writing in.

She saw my hesitation and misunderstanding my pause and said I could take her car. I said, “What can I get for ya'?"

I got the bike started and rolled down the dirt-gravel road and started out on this part of the adventure. The Grinner fishtailed and spluttered with the old plugs all the way up the rain drenched road. I got the groceries and turned around to the cabin stewing in my brain.

A little bit into this part of the journey, I started to think about my friend in the cabin and how she always seems to find the bright side of everything. I knew I had to get out of this dark place I found myself in.

I let the engine of the Grinner fill me and relax my shoulders a little. The engine, seemingly of it own will growled a little lower and louder, the tires rolled a little faster. The curves got a little steeper and a slight grin spread across my frowning maw.

The turn to the dirt road came too soon for me, but the Grinner turned obediently in and we started up the gravely road. It seemed to me the Grinner felt the same about the road as I did, because it groaned and moaned all the way up. It spluttered and choked and began to fowl. I had to rev a little to clear its throat, again that smile as the thunder filled the air around us.

Bacon, pancakes and sausage where on the table in no time. Maple syrup and fake butter filled our tummy's. When we sated our hunger, I pulled and gapped the Grinners plug's. After cleaning them, they went back in and she fired up! She sounded throaty and powerful and ready to leave this beautiful place.

About that time Humphrey needed to go out and do his thing. He is the Boston Terrier of the animal menagerie and the coolest of the lot. Across the road, incredibly enough, were two other Boston Terriers. Who could imagine that! Well, the three guys had to show each other who was who. I am not sure who won that confrontation. All I got out of it was a lot of growling, screeching and running black and white little beasties. Again a little smile slipped across my face.

I spent a minute packing the bike and said our good byes. The bike merely needed me to pay a little attention to it, because she started up and grumbled and roared her happy relief to be rolling again. I wish people could be so easily gratified. We said our goodbyes and put it all behind us.

The ride back was more of the same, long roads at highway speeds. We found ourselves in the Nantahala Gorge and a little hungry. No luck there though, so we rode on down to Bryson City and a pizza place. The Runtyun said she was not really hungry, so I had an antipasto salad and water. I changed my mind though and ordered a Peach Sangria. 

The salad was OK, but the Sangria finally nudged me into my happy place. Nothing had really changed, but I found my smile. I had my kid, the bike was running well, the sky was blue and I was able to put all of my concerns aside and focus on the road ahead. 

It never ceases to amaze me the ability of a ride to clear one's head of all the Bullshit we let fill it. I felt the wind and heard the engine. My little girl was holding on and trusting her father to take care of her. I felt good about life.

Nothing much else happened for the rest of the ride except the Grinner amazed me and went nearly 100 miles on the last tank. We went to reserve  at some point and I wondered if we could make it home.

We did make it! I have to say, I was relieved. After filling the tank with 3.25 gallons of gas, (its capacity is 3.3 gallons) I realized there were merely ounces left in the tank. She held out for us in that run to home.

So that was our adventure of the Labor Day weekend. I hope every one else had one that was as full as ours.

olc

I had to wait too long

I wanted to get some maintenance done on the van Saturday, so I made an appointment at the Firestone franchise. Most of my vehicle maintenance is done there and I am usually very happy with their service.

This time I wanted to have the tires rotated, which is free-a great incentive, and an oil change. 

I made the appointment for 7:30 AM so I could get on with the day. (Early bird, and so forth.) I arrived at 7:20 hoping to get the whole thing done in an expeditious manner. 

Walking in the door, I saw 3 or four other customers with the same idea. It's a good thing I made that appointment, I reminded myself.

At the desk, I was told that it may be a minute or two before they get my van into a dock. I said that was why I made an appointment, so I would not have to wait. No reply. Then I was told that I should be out after 8:00 AM. OK. Great, that is not so bad, I thought.

I waited and watched my van sit in the parking lot for over an hour before it even got moved into a bay. It finally made it into the bay an hour and 10 minutes after the appointed time. 

There was a managers special on oil changes and I wanted to take advantage of it. It turns out though, I needed to fill out an application for some promotion in order to get the advertised rate. 

Disappointment number two.

I gave specific instructions on how I wanted the tires rotated, but the job was done differently. 

Disappointment number three.

I have been going to Firestone for 5 years now and this is the first real complaint I have had. It is just plain annoying to get up and out of the house on an early Saturday morning for an appointment and have to wait for over an hour for a service that takes less then 30 minutes to do.

What do you think? Am I whining over nothing or do I have a legitimate complaint?

Let me know what you think.

olc

This beginners view of how I understand the Conservative view

I was watching Netflix's House of Cards and I had a kind of epiphany. 

During the pre-show credits there is a montage of Washington, D.C. views, some of which show a positive outlook while others show the underbelly of the city. Two times during the opening, the image of the Lions at the memorial for U.S. Grant are shown. These are proud beasts on their posts of honor, with heads held high. More than any other part of the program these images seem to personify the power of American pride (see what I did there?   ;-O).

I have been struggling lately trying to understand how those on the right can be so obtuse. I just cannot understand how a large segment of our society can work against a segment of their very own society. I have been trying to bend my brain into excepting the thought that they just don't care about those not as fortunate, or lucky or forceful.

As I understand it, Conservatives and Libertarians, among other things, pride themselves on their independence and self-sufficiency. They picture themselves as the lone wolf (or lion, as the case may be)...the leaders who need no support, only they can do it right.

Now lets remember, I am not a part of this political movement, so what I am saying here is my interpretation, or observation.

The Conservative right wing of the Republican Party seems to think that a smaller government will be the best thing for our country as a whole. There is no doubt that a smaller less regulated society would be better for, in the short run at any rate, many members of our society. Business 101 says that a business needs to do whatever it takes to create a better bottom line. This is a sound business practice that has worked for a long, long time (long before the Earth has gotten as populated as it is, with its resources becoming scarce as they are now).

This thinking does not take into account the environment, or the socio-economic world we live today, it only rewards the making of money equalling success. Nor does it, in my opinion, take into account the ability to keep making money while growing a powerful base for the future.

I have a whole lot more to say on the subject, most of it is progressive in nature. What I have to say looks out for the future of our world and society. So lets get a conversation going and see what we can do for the future of our kids!

As in the opening credits of House of Cards, lets understand that we have a beautiful and powerful country, but there is an underbelly of corruption and filth that we, as citizens of our great country, need to purify!

olc

Here is my, totally insignificant, and short review of writing.com

         The plethora of resources available on writing.com is great! There is so much here that I have not even begun to discover it all. I like the that I can review some one’s story or poetry and get recognition for it. When I finally do get the story I am writing finished, I will be able to have people look at it and give advice on editing through final publication, whether it is be an ePub or actual book form.  There are writing contests to be entered---and won. If I decide to upload a story and have it reviewed by other authors, this can be dune too. If I get to a place in a story where I don’t know what to do, their prompts will help me find my muse. Such a great resource for such a minuscule price!

My time is limited and this means that I do not get to spend much of it exploring the depths of anything. As I bump into something that I think will benefit me, I look into it. So, that means I have not really delved into the depths provided by this site. Yet, from what I have seen so far, I like it.

Reviewing another author's story is a great exercise in self analysis. It helps one to look at some ones work and find something different. It also helps the reviewer to find perceived flaws in their own work and maybe find a better interpretation, thus helping to open new ideas and literary and imaginative roads to pursue. The only thing I have an issue with is the reward system. Most if the time we are given a fairly short amount of time to read then reread and write and rewrite a brief review. Now I am of the opinion that if some one puts their hard written work up for review, they want an honest and well thought out critique. To be honest, I cannot not do a quality assignment in an hour or so, especially if the work is over 1000 words.
Now I know I could just ignore the gift points that are offered as incentive, but I don't want to loose out on them. Quite the dilemma though, I will however, keep reviewing a project even after the time allotted for rewards has passed. Hmm, quite the dilemma.

The whole idea of crowd editing is a great one. There will be a time when I'll need to have my work edited and eventually published and the idea of reaching out is made easier because of the resources provided by writing.com. Also, due to the contests, I have found myself, writing some short stories and submitting them for review. And as I said earlier anytime we can get positive feed back is a time to rejoice.

Though this is far in my future, a couple months anyhow, the site has access to publishing agents and, hopefully, by then, I hope I'll have enough savvy to reach out and use them. And from there the sky is the limit.

Well, that is about all I have been able to figure out concerning the site. I know there is so much more to explore here and I'll get to it eventually. Suffice it to say that for the meagre amount of money for subscription, I am very happy with everything I have seen. Now let's see if the site can improve my writing skills to the point of a professional! (of course we know the writer ios not the tools he, or she uses, but the imagination and the ability to put those thought into a cohesive form. Good tools do help though, just sayin’

Thank you for taking a moment of your life to read my words. Please leave a comment and any critique to make it better.

A New Chapter Begins

To anyone out there who wants to know. 1-15-2014

I have been a loyal customer of Brueggers Bagels for a long time, something like 6 or 7 years. The bagels are great and variety of cream cheeses fine. Even the coffee is good and the new one to replace French Roast, which is Dark Roast, has a nice rich flavor that holds up even against cream and sugar. Yummy!

The idea of having the bottomless cup for a year, is great marketing ploy and has worked well for me.When I have a few moments of free time, I go there and use their wifi for various things. I fool myself into thinking that I am being productive, but mostly I surf or Facebook. This time during my free time has translated into more revenue for Brueggers, because I'll get something to eat, either a salad or sandwich, while I am there.

FREE CUP of COFFEE + SANDWICH = MONEY for the franchise. This is a great deal for every one, they get my money and I get a place to "work."

My issue now is the price of this bottomless cup: $159.95. C'mon guys! Even with the incentives, we are talking about a lot of money for a cup of coffee.

I understand that coffee costs money to produce and sell and a company needs to mitigate its expenses. You know what though, now that I do not have the tether of a free cup of coffee, I have discovered other places with wifi and good coffee. I still go to my local Bruegger's, but only once or twice a week, not the three or four times of last year. I still spend my hard earned money, but Bruegger's does not get as much as last year.

In a way, this is a good thing for me, because I go to other places and have a more varied experience during the day. Yet Bruegger's loses out on my business and money, while other local coffee shops gain it.

I'll miss going to Bruegger's as much as I used to, but now I can visit other places and try other fine foods. Having said all that, I will still go to Bruegger's Bagel when I need my Bagel fix. However, right now I am at a place called CityMug writing this letter.

Yours truly, Neil M. Turner

chefneil01@yahoo.com

olc